SOG tool

SOG multi-toolIf you're a smart macho man like me, you'll drop everything now and get one of these SOG multi-tools. I've had mine for twenty years and use it every day for uncapping beer bottles and repairing all kinds of crap. I use the pliers for holding hot metal in the shop, and the wire cutters for, uh, cutting wires.

Last week while riding to work, I slammed into a grapefruit-sized rock on the road. The impact bent my chain ring into an unworkable mess and I was miles from my destination.  Fortunately I had my SOG tool and wrestled the ring back to rideable condition. There were no witnesses, but I assure you it was pretty cool.

In December, a family member crashed his motorcycle near my home. He was fortunately unharmed, but his damaged clutch lever required a file to shape it into a working state. My SOG tool fixed that and I got some macho points despite being a total pussy without a motorcycle of my own.

My wife clowns me for wearing the SOG tool belt pouch to formal events like weddings, but I contend that in the event of a major earthquake, we could be buried under rubble and I'd use the SOG tool to chip us out to safety. She shakes her head because she knows I'm right.

Get a SOG tool.